The Galaxy Positioning System in the dashboard of Rigabold’s Dodge RAM told him to head north. The Galaxy Positioning System, or GPS, helped Tumcuddulan’s navigate multiple universes and worked by bouncing signals of millions of beacons installed on planets, moons and stars. It’s operation was similar to the Global Positioning System Earthlings used, but on a much wider and more reliable scale, and the two naming conventions being so close to each other was a pure coincidence.
Although Rigabold the pernicketness the had studied the maps of Australia whilst preparing for his journey he had no idea why the GPS told him to head north instead of south when he hit the dirt road. South seemed like it was a more likely choice for him to reach his destination sooner but when it came to the reliability of the Tumcuddlulan GPS one rarely argued so therefore Rigabold would not argue either.
The computer had told him before he emerged from the ship that the immediate area was clear of other people who might have seen him appear seemingly from nowhere. However while the Stargazer was invisible his vehicle was not and it would be hard to explain why he was driving around so close to the Wolfe Creek crater if someone did happen upon him, so he decided it was time to move and head towards the road.
Rigabold turned onto to the Tanami Road, a dirt track which wasn’t in terrible condition considering where it was located but was in no way shape or form the kind of road he’d seen only hours before when he was looking for a parking spot. There was no cars, as the computer had suggested, and there wasn’t even dust on the horizon suggesting other vehicles were even close. According to the GPS he had about a hundred and forty three kilometres to travel before his first stop, he wasn’t entirely sure if his first stop would yield his first taste of the magnificent Chiko Roll but he could only hope.
“Oh Snuckcuggerness!” Rigbaold said to the empty car, them immediately reminded himself that he was on earth and in an earth body therefore he needed to stop using Tumcuddulan terms. “Oh Fuck!” he repeated himself.
The four letter earth word did not have the power, the feel or the satisfaction that the Tumcuddulan expletive did but he was going to have to get used to it. It wasn’t that humans were smart enough to hear words such as snuckcuggerness and figure out he was from another galaxy, it was because they weren’t smart enough that they posed such a risk. Their inability to understand something often led them to destroying the problem not learning from it and that was something Rigabold could not allow.
“Oh Fuck!” he said again. “Did I leave the stove on?”
Rigabold began laughing, it started out as a small, quiet laugh but quickly turned into a loud, uncontrollably laugh. The joke, which he had heard used more times than he cared to remember in movies and films that he’d watched as a part of his study of the Earth creatures, would have been funnier if there was someone in the car to share it with, especially another Tumcuddulan who would understand it, but beggars could not be choosers apparently.
Of course the joke was that he didn’t leave the stove on and even if he did it wasn’t like he had left the Stargazer helpless, the computer was always on and would noticed something as silly as a stove being turned on and not being used. Now if he’d left a pot noodle on the stove things could have been different.
One of the other handy features of the GPS Rigabold had installed in the Ram was the ability to know what was ahead of him. Unlike the standard Earth GPS that only had directions and times, Rigabold’s system was able to tell him what, if any, traffic was ahead, but most of all what the road condition was like. Because he knew what was ahead of him he was able to increase his speed beyond the hundred kilometre per hour speed limit without fear of the road condition, police or other vehicles.
Rigabold kept one eye on the GPS and one on the road, it was a odd look if seen from straight on and he could understand why all but a few Earthlings had ever mastered it. His arrival estimation was going to see him arrive at the next town not long after 1pm which seemed to him like a good time to eat, he just hoped he could find somewhere that would sell him a Chiko Roll.
About twenty minutes out of town Rigabold’s GPS beeped at him and warned that he would be passing two other vehicles in four and a half minutes time. Immediately he backed off the throttle and slowed the Ram down to eighty kilometres per hour. When he noticed that one of the vehicles coming towards his was a white four wheel drive with red and blue lights on the roof and the letters P-O-L-I-C-E written down the side he backed off another twenty. The road wasn’t overly rough and he was sure that dropping his speed to sixty kilometres per hour was slow enough to show some sort of courtesy to the on coming drivers.
For no reason other than he thought it was polite Rigabold waved to the police car and they passed each other, the occupant of the police vehicle waved back. About five car lengths back from the police vehicle a second vehicle was following, a white squarish white truck like vehicle which was bigger than his own Ram and had a large flat tray behind the cabin.
As he had done with the first vehicle Rigabold waved to the driver of the second vehicle, the female driver of that vehicle also waved back politely. Even at sixty kilometres per hour it was hard to read the writing on the door of the white truck but he was sure the first word was spelt something similar to D-E-A-N the other two lines he didn’t pick.
Not long after the dust of the two cars has disappeared out of Rigabold’s rear vision mirrors he was pulling into the town of Halls Creek and looking for the Roadhouse his GPS told him he might be able to purchase a Chiko Roll from.