Splash, Splash I was givin’ a bath
Washing my old faithful truck.
Rub a dub do, just cleaning her down
Thinking that things are okay
Ok, so that doesn’t rhyme or fit in with the original song but hey I was washing the Beast and having a relaxing time after a long hard day. However as I said last time I was under the rear end spraying all the crap and crud off the diff when the worst thing possible happened.
Matthew called out my name!
I’m only kidding that wasn’t the worst thing that could happen but what followed him calling my name was.
I wasn’t entirely sure that I heard my name because even with the pressure washer in the shed it was noisy out there and I wasn’t in the best place for sound to travel to. I’d pretty much finished the first going over underneath the tray so I was getting out from there anyway.
What I didn’t expect as I stood up and poked my head over the top edge of the tray was for that smart arse brother of mine to be standing near the front of the Beast with a sopping wet and soapy sponge in his hand.
Having seen that I guess I probably should have guessed that the sopping wet and soapy sponge was going to be given a flying lesson and that lesson was going to be in my direction.
What I wouldn’t have expected, even I’d seen all that and if I expected the sopping wet and soapy sponge to have been given flying lessons was for Matthew’s aim to be spot on. That’s right SPOT ON!
As soon as that sopping wet and soapy sponge left Matthew’s hand it was dead on target, it flew straight and true and the damn thing hit me fair in the forehead. It hit with a loud splotch, although the volume of the splotch might have been louder for me given that I was the reason it splotched where it did.
Because I was wearing sun glasses the majority of the soapy water didn’t go in my eyes but my sunnies certainly didn’t stop the rest of my face getting wet. The sponge was nearly as large as my face and almost instantly the entire left side of my face was dripping with water. Then even before the sponge fell forward and dropped onto the tray of the Beast I could feel water running down my neck and into my shirt.
I looked directly at Matthew, he was standing at the front of the Beast near the passenger door, with the biggest smirk on his face. Once he realised I was looking at him that smirk turned into laughter and once that laughter got too much for him he bent over held onto the side of the Beast and laughed some more.
“Oh yes, very funny. You are absolutely hilarious.” I said to him in my grumpiest voice.
I wasn’t really grumpy but if I had replied cheerfully there was more chance that Matthew would have picked up on it and realised I was going to pay him back for his good aim. You could be mistaken for thinking that he wasn’t already preparing himself for my payback given that I hadn’t let too many things slip since he arrived but trust me payback was the furthest thing from his mind. How do I know this? Quite easily really.
In a matter of seconds Matthew went from leaning on the side of the Beast laughing so had I thought he was going to have a hernia to dancing around with his hands in the air cheering like a drunken football player.
“Got you, I got you. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, I got you!” He was so caught up in his own world it wouldn’t have mattered what tone I used. He was also so caught up in his own world that he added an extra nah to his statement and completely ruined the rhythm.
I picked the sponge up from the tray of the Beast, it was still quiet soggy despite it having hit two different surfaces.
“You seem to have misplaced something, City Boy!” I called to him as he dance around looking silly.
Matthew stopped dancing and said, “Oh I didn’t misplace it. I know exactly where it is.” his smiled and took a breath then added, “So how’s the face, Drip!”
“Oh about as good as yours is going to be.”
“Oh like I’m scared of you sis!”
“You’re pretty cocky considering.” I said across the the tray of the Beast.
“Why? What are you going to do throw the thing back at me?” Once again his cockiness took over and he came up with. “As if your aim as ever been good enough to make a shot like that!”
“Oh I’m not going to hit you with the sponge, that would be too easy.” Well it may not have been but at the same time it’s not what I had in mind.
It was at about that time that I think Matthew realise what I was going to hit him with and he immediately lost the thought of humour and bravado.
“No, you’re not? You can’t.” Despite him realising and not wanting it to happen he still didn’t move. “You can’t hit me with that!”
“Oh yes I can!”
Now I guess each and every time I use the pressure cleaner I am actually aiming it at something, be it the under carriage of the Beast or some stubborn dirt, or even just loose dirt. However I don’t need to hit the exact target when I do that, close enough and then adjust is more than enough because of how much spray there is. I also hadn’t ever hit a living target, but all that was about to change.
From the rear of the Beast I lifted the nozzle of the pressure spray above the tray and held it with one hand. I pointed the squirty end directly at Matthew.
Previous Outback Rescue story here.