Do you ever get the feeling you are going around and around in circles and there is no sign of stopping?
Have I said that before?
Do you ever getting the feeling that the person you are talking too is deliberately being silly and playing games with you?
Actually I think I have asked that question before too.
If you answered yes to either of the questions above I guess you know Téa as well and I feel so sorry for you. No, No, No, I’m only kidding, honestly she’s a great person, fun to be around, quiet well educated, easy too look at, willing to share, she’s just a little cray cray and she doesn’t mind sharing that with her friends.
So instead of getting involved in another circular conversation about whether or not I could do dishes, whether or not she had any cash left and whatever else we’d been discussing for the last twenty minutes without resolution I decided to take matters into my own hands. I should have done it before the last conversation we had which started out with the dishes and ended with frustration but I gave Téa the benefit of the doubt, I quickly had nothing left but doubts!
I gripped the table of the little booth we were sitting at, twisted my hips, pushed my legs out from under the table and began to slide my way off the seat and into a standing position.
“Where are you going?” Téa said to me.
“I thought I’d go next door and ask the mechanic if he had any jobs going. Figured I needed to be employed if I was going to pay my way in this neck of the woods.” I replied looking down at Téa.
“Don’t be stupid, I said you needed to dishes not fix people’s cars.”
I had to give her some credit even when she had no idea what was going on she was still able to treat things like a joke.
“Well I don’t know how to do dishes, I know how to fix cars though.” I replied.
“You don’t do dishes in Down Under land?” She paused as her brain caught up with her mouth “Now that is a lie I know you do them I saw you do them when I was there last time.”
“Yes but we’ve evolved, now days we just throw crockery away rather than wash them, it saves water.” I came back with.
“You throw them away?”
“Well actually we throw them at American tourists who annoy us by talking in circles all the time.” I responded trying not to smile. “It’s become a bit of a sport, you should visit again soon so I can use you as a target…oops I mean show you how it’s done!”
Without missing a beat she came back with. “Are you being smart and suggesting I talk in circles, Koala boy?”
“I’ll have you know koalas aren’t just cute and cuddly they are pretty vicious and will tear your face off if you upset them!”
“Oh well that doesn’t describe you at all, does it. Sit down Kangaroo Boy.”
“Haven’t you ever seen the boxing Kangroo?” I replied.
“Yeah but you don’t have gloves on and you wouldn’t punch a lady.” this time the smirk on Téa’s face was undeniably smug.
“You’re right,” I said with a little sigh as I sat back down, “And if I see one at this table I’ll be sure not to punch her!”
“Hey!” Téa said in response but it was a half hearted response.
“It’s what horses eat.”
“Hay, it’s what horses eat.”
“I said hey, not hay!” Téa responded, there was a slight difference in the way she said each word and I knew what she was talking about but why should she have all the fun?
“Yeah and that is what horses eat. Cows eat it too!”
“Are you calling me a cow?”
“Are you calling me a kangaroo?”
“You are! You are calling me a cow. A cow that eats hay!”
I took a breath and thought for a second or two then came back with, “How are you at doing the dishes?”
Téa looked across the table at me, she didn’t say a word but her eyes were closed slightly and there was a little twitch at the end of her mouth. I looked down at the table to make sure there was no ice cream left on her spoon, there wasn’t, I relaxed slightly.
“Weren’t you going next door to get a job?” she replied after a few moments of silence.
Despite the context of the comment it wasn’t delivered with any sting and I was beginning to think I’d finally wound Téa down to a reasonable level.
“Don’t you want me to help you do the dishes?”
“Yes I do. I’ll use your head as a sponge!”
If she was wound down at all she still had a few turns to go! But the truth was I didn’t really want to wind her down too much, she was more fun when she was play her little games and letting her win was my good deed for the day.
There was a moment of silence before Téa broke it with, “Forget the dishes we need to get our asses moving.”
“Asses? Will you be my donkey?” I replied.
“Awe that’s sweet, no one has ever asked me that. But let me put it in a way you might understand it better.” Téa then added, “We need ta be gettin’ our arrrses movin’!” the emphasis on the elongated ‘r’ ruining the otherwise damn fine mocking of the Aussie accent.
“Why?” I asked.
“Look up there,” she pointed up the road.
I had to turn to see where she was pointing but when I did the figure of the old lady walking along the road was unmistakable.
“But how?” I asked thinking it was impossible for an old lady of any kind to catch up to us like she did, let alone one on foot.
“How is not our immediate issue.” Téa replied. “Here put your hand on this.” She was holding the watch.
Previous episode here.