There is a little bird outside
Tweeting away with all it’s pride
Happy little fucker is sadly misled
Because I’m gunna fill it full of lead
Put a bullet is it’s head
Paint the wall in a colour of red
Blood and brains on the wall, they spread

Shit, that got gory real fast
Tweety gone with one quick blast
Sunday morning started oh so sweet
But now Tweety lays at my feet
Some may say it’s one sick blow
But the fucker will no longer shit on my patio

Don’t get me wrong got nothing against birds
I just don’t need all their turds
Not on the patio where the kids do play
The birds don’t even yell “bombs away”
So it was my job as superhero to teach them a lesson
Trust me now there will be no more poop session

Speaking of birds and what they do so fowl
Did I ever tell you I once hit an owl?
The hard headed fucker hit with such a clang
Every damn panel on that truck rang
The Kamikaze owl just needed a rest
In truck versus owl he came off second best.

All of this from one little bird and it’s tweet
If Tweety had Twitter things would have been sweet
Tweety could have tweeted and been a big hit
And like everyone else spread the Net with its shit
Silly little birdie should have known better
Tweeting in the morning when it could have sent me a letter

So when you next wake on a Sunday morning
Feel free to read my words and heed my warning
Sunny morning and chirping birds
Means afternoon sweeping, cleaning up turds.
Or you remove the problem with a twenty two
And you too can have a dinner of birdie stew.