I’m gonna kick ass
I’m gonna spit broken glass
I’m gonna shoot out all of your lights
I wanna eat dirt,
I’m gonna eat my own shirt
Angel city tonight
Strangely enough it was the first time whilst I’d been at Angel City that I had found myself sitting there singing the words from Motorhead’s song of the same name.
I got a buncha boys
We make a lot of noise
Little bit crazy,
Playing with chemical toys
We’re such bad ass dudes
Almost can’t stand it myself
I wanna get the crabs
In my elegant rags,
Make my mom and daddy uptight
I wanna be an intellectual
Heterosexual, angel city tonight
I was singing the lyrics out of order, but I was doing it almost without thinking because my mind was on other things. Lemmy had not long ago told me I was the new custodian of the computer system that controlled the entire mansion that was Angel City. Pretty much everything in Angel City except the breathing was handled by the computer system, room lights, stage lights, heating, cooling, power, everything, it was truly the automated home of the future that so many people in the real world claim is possible but are yet to prove.
While Lemmy sat at one of the computers reading the information I’d provided him on paper and he’d seamlessly scanned into the computer system at the touch of a single button I familiarised myself with the system. I did know my way around a computer but I obviously wasn’t going to learn everything about the system before me in one single sitting but none the less I was looking around and getting an idea of what was before me.
So what was my first task as BOFH with GOD mode enabled? I navigated straight to the games directory and loaded up Warcraft II, the old DOS game from the late 90’s where you control and army of human warriors who build villages and defend themselves against the might Orcs. I hadn’t played the game in neigh on twenty years and when I saw it on the system I couldn’t help but load it up to see if it worked. Although I knew many people around the world had got it running on newer systems it was not something I’d had the time to do over the years. To be honest given the time it takes to play a level of Warcraft II I probably didn’t have time to sit there and play while Lemmy was reading either but I just had to try it.
I must have been singing a bit louder than I thought as I built castles, barracks and farms at the same time as training foot soldiers and archers because as I began to sing the chorus of Angel City for a third time I heard Lemmy’s gravelly voice and it brought me out of my little game trance.
“You should try singing on stage.”
“Huh?” I responded more in thought about my foot soldiers than the room around me. “Really? Sorry I didn’t realise I was singing out aloud.”
“You most definitely were.”
I’m not sure why I turned the conversation back around at that point because I’d never had any dreams of being a singer but for some reason I went back to his initial comment.
“You really think I’ve got a good enough voice to be on stage?” I asked.
Without hesitation Lemmy replied. “Nope!” We both laughed, lucky I wasn’t taking him too seriously, he then added. “But hey that never stopped me!”
I guess we can all be a little self critical at times, Lemmy had been singing on stage for fifty years yet he could still make jokes about his inability to sing. Love or hate him the guy had proven that he had the popularity and following to sustain a career unmatched by too many others.
I still hadn’t quite got a grip on time in Angel City, it seemed to tick along just like the real world but whenever I got caught up doing something time always seemed to move faster and when Lemmy wheeled his desk chair away from the computer and told me he was off to prepare for the evening gig I couldn’t believe it had jumped to that time of day.
“I really appreciate the information you sorted out. As you can see we have a good system here but without the Internet we are lacking in a few things. What you organised was exactly what was needed. Before you head back we need to discuss the next thing I need doing.”
“No worries Lem,” I said. We were both sitting casually in desk chairs looking at each other and talking like age old business partners and friends. “No sure how long I’m hanging around for this time, I’ve gotta be back for…”
I thought about it a second, then laughed, Lemmy did too as we both realised what I was saying.
“Takes a bit to get used to coming and going from the time zones does it?” he asked with a smile on his face.
“Apparently.” I replied. “Guess I don’t have to be back for anything, but I’m still not sure how long I’ll be hanging around for. Anyway confusion aside I’ll be sure to make time to discuss what you need before I go.”
Unsurprising enough when Lemmy left the room I immediately turned back to the screen to build up my army of warriors. I had a village to defend and a bunch of Orc Warriors to kill.
I told you that when I was doing something time really got away from me whilst I was in Angel City and I wasn’t kidding I played Warcraft II for nearly two full hours before I looked at the clock and realised not only hadn’t I eaten but I hadn’t bloody moved either.
I saved my game, got up from the chair and headed back towards the foyer. Other than the room I’d had breakfast in during my previous stay the only room I knew I could get food in was the theatre where I’d had popcorn while watching a Manowar concert on the big screen. I didn’t really feel like pop corn for dinner a second time so I headed towards the room I knew.
I managed to find myself some dinner, a decent roast pork with all the trimmings none the less, and it was bloody brilliant. I honestly don’t think I’d had a better pork roast in my life and I have eaten in many a restaurant searching for one.
I presumed the band hit the stage at the same time every night and although I didn’t have to go and see them it did seem like a bit of a waste to be in Angel City and not see a reformed Motorhead play some songs, so after dinner I made my way towards the bar where Lemmy, Würzel and Philthy Phil would take the stage.
When I walked in the door of the bar my first thought was to get myself a Jack Daniels and coke, it had been a dry afternoon and I was hanging for a drink, but I was stopped in my tracks. I remembered Lemmy telling me that occasionally other people dropped in to see the gigs, given there was no one else in Angel City I didn’t really take his comment seriously at the time, but I was obviously wrong.
As I walked towards the middle of the room I could see someone sitting in the same seat I had sat in and watched the band play on my previous visit. At first I didn’t recognise the person but as promised myself I wasn’t going to get
panicked. As I got closer and could see more of his face I realised it was…
Previous Angel City story here.