Once upon a time you were elfish
Some might even say swellish
Others would probably say hellish
But I’d still dip you in relish

Maybe we could mix the relish with mustard
It would be better that than custard
Such a powder would only make it clustered
And that would just make you flustered

It would taste better if we added pepper
It would taste terrible with added hepar
I know you now think I’m a schlepper
But at least I’m no longer a leper

A little seasoning with salt
And a double pinch of malt
It might taste like asphalt
But I tell ya it’s not my fault

If I added some spice
I don’t care for the price
I’ll just carve off a slice
I’m sure you’ll taste nice

I know you’re allergic to herbs
But I’m running out of verbs
Lets head out to the ‘burbs
Another name could be exurbs

That previous section
Really had no connection
to the upper bisection
or the dinner selection

So dinner’s on you
It’s not really a stew
I just hope I don’t spew
In your high heeled shoe

This poem may not be great
And my names not really Kate
But it’s the best I can plate
Now the prompt is so late.