Random Thoughts of the Midnight Cowboy

The Midnight Cowboy gets a Monkey

Original story starts here

Tuesday 9th June

Shit I hate training people.
I’m sure the boss just does this to test me.
Five nights with this guy so far, not only can’t he add up he can’t even remember where all the shops are yet.
No way he’s going to be ready for working by himself this weekend.
Dammit looks like another thirteen day fortnight for me.
I know it’s difficult trying to find casuals who only want to work one or two nights a week and bust their arse for twelve hours each of those nights, but the boss’s knack for hiring the dumbest and laziest pricks in the world is getting a little tiresome.
What’s that ahead?
Oh flashing lights.
Must be at the Jonesy’s Shop. Wonder what’s going on.
“Pull the truck over at the shop up here, I’m going to have a chat to the cops make sure everything is ok.”
*Out of truck trainee sit in drivers seat glazed look through windscreen*
*back in truck*
“Let’s get going, nothing we can do here, was a break in at the shop.”
*Back on the road*
“What? You thought the place had been burgled when you delivered there a hour ago?”
“The front door was open and there was shit all over the floor?”
“Why the hell didn’t you say something?”
“Of course it wasn’t you, sheesh no one would have thought it was you.”
“If you didn’t bother reporting it yourself the least you could have done was told me so I could report it.”
”NO ONE would have blamed you. Sheesh, you know I’m on good terms with the cops around here.”
“Turn the truck around.”
“We’re going back so you can tell Constable Conroy what you saw.”
“Oh bloody hell!! No one is going to blame you, just turn the truck around.”
‘Where does the boss find these morons?’

Pull over this is the cops

Pull over this is the cops

Sunday 12th October.

Well at least you’re going to cure your plane insomnia this afternoon.
Gotta stay awake long enough to get to the airport.
Shit this is going to be a long night.
What’s that light?
Don’t be stupid it’s a plane coming into the airport.
Whoops, keep your eyes open and stay on the left side of that white line.
Thump, Thump Thump.
Crap, nice going idiot, see if you can hit every pothole
Oh dear, still six hours till home.

Phew only four hours until home, getting closer.
Still got five hours after that until the plane leaves.
Not to mention the five hour flight
And the two hour time change.
Damn even if you do sleep on the plane you’re going to be stuffed by bed time tonight.
Geez, what’s with the warning lights on the dash
Shit please don’t be serious.
Did the engine just stagger?
Awe crap not this morning. I don’t need a bloody breakdown this morning.
Seems ok now, might have just been a gremlin.

Sigh, only two hours to home time. I can almost smell breakfast.
Wonder if Jen is awake yet.
Wonder if she’s excited about taking me home to met her family for the first time.
Guess she is or she wouldn’t be doing it.
Her sister is ok, wonder what the rest of them are like
They can’t be all bad, they created Jen, and she’s pretty amazing.
Shit eyes, stay awake.
Come on not long to go now.
It’s a long haul down the highway home after such a long night but you can do it.
Come on head, wake up.
Oh shit truck, stay on the road.
I wasn’t asleep, I wasn’t asleep, I wasn’t asleep.
Shit get off the gravel
Wind the window down, light a smoke, turn the radio up. WAKE UP IDIOT!

Thank god for that, the depot is nearly in sight.
What a long day.
No rest yet, still got hours to go yet.
Add the time difference getting over to the west and you’re going to have been awake more than 24 hours by the time you get dinner.
Consider the distances.
600 ks on the road in the truck, 100ks in the car and 4000ks in a plane, that’s impressively for 24 hours.
Oh shit I missed the drive way. Too much thinking, turn around up here.
Geez I hope they like me when we get there. I’m going to be knackered even if I sleep on the plane.
Come on door open up.
Geez it’s great having an automatic door but shit this one is slow.
Finally open, in I go.
Nearly over. Closer to meeting the in laws.
Oh crap, stop stressing over the trip and park the truck without removing the loading dock.
Air brakes on.
Time to leave, what a night!

Midnight Cowboy

Midnight Cowboy

Thursday 21 April

Aw shit it’s suppose to be 85572#
Crap that’s going to set the alarm off.
Wooooooooooooo Wooooooooooo
Bloody hell
If Frank wasn’t so paranoid about false alarms he’d install a better alarm system that didn’t need him to override it
Wooooooooooooo Wooooooooooo
Dammit, all this for three loaves of bread.
I don’t need this shit.
“Yeah Frank it’s only me.”
“I hit the wrong code”
Eww shit Frank’s come down stairs wearing only his underwear.
Argh my eyes!

“Cya Frank”
“Yeah ya bloody right, I wont make that mistake again, my eye balls will never recover!”