“My life is far from Carefree!”
“But all you do all day is sit on the bed and look cute.”
“You can’t honestly think that’s all I do?”
“Well why don’t you share with us what it is you do all day that makes your life ‘far from Carefree‘.”
It was about that time the large, plush, polar bear with the green pompom hat, green scarf and cute smile went quiet and I realised my wife walked into the bedroom.
Big bear, as he was affectionately known because he was head and shoulders bigger than Snowflake the other polar bear that sat on our bed, only ever talked to me. It wasn’t that he didn’t like my wife, after all he was tattooed on the foot with the year we were married just to remind him of how happy that year was, he just claimed his magic was better concentrated on one human at a time.
Jen knew that the room going silent as she entered wasn’t a sign of disrespect or anything sinister it was simply a sign that Big Bear and I were having a conversation. She was, after all a smart women, and a woman who had very similar conversations with Snowflake when I wasn’t in the room, (but that’s the source of another story).
Jen exited the room and was less than half way down the hallway when our conversation continued.
“Well for starters looking this cute might come natural but I don’t just sit here all day and wait for you to wander in and talk to me.”
I politely waited for him to elaborate further.
“Well for starters while you’re out in the rest of the house doing those weird ‘human things’ with Jen I’m here making sure that these other boofheads toe the line.”
The boofheads he was referring to were Snowflake, a smaller and equally cute polar bear a few years his senior, Tickles a cute, if not just a little egotistical tiger with bean bag feet and a gollywog aptly named Golly.
There was murmurs from the other three boofheads that indicated they weren’t happy with the inference that they needed to be kept in line but they said nothing.
“Well that seems like an easy task, you boofheads are the best behaved boofheads I’ve ever known,” I said. “What else makes your like ‘far from Carefree’.”
“What about the fact that while you and Jen go out I keep the house safe?”
“From what Tickles tells me you guys have parties, loud music, flashing lights and lots of food, whenever we go out.”
“Has the house ever been broken into?” Big Bear replied.
I had to concede every time Jen and I left the house we always returned to a house that was in exactly the same state as it was when we left, no trace of parties, no trace of intruders and no trace of trouble.
“Ok is there anything else?” I asked. “You obviously don’t do the housework or clean up the place.”
“Pfft, as if I, or we, have time for such pointless tasks.”
“Ok so what else do you do?”
“I give you someone to talk too in the wee hours of the morning while you lay in bed not sleeping.”
Again I had to conceded that that particular job was not only important but extremely appreciated.
“Alright so I admit that you do more than just sit there looking cute, but they still seem like fairly Carefree type jobs if you have a handle on them.”
“So what you’re saying is that me missing out on sleep is a good thing?”
“Well if I am missing out shouldn’t those who care about me also miss out?” I said cheekily while Big Bear chose to ignore the question.
“What about the most important job of all?”
“And what’s that?” I asked.
“The one job that not only myself but all four of us boofheads have to do all day everyday. A job that is so important that all other jobs fail in comparison. A job that if we didn’t do you’re whole world would come crashing down.”
I had to admit I was intrigued. “And what is this job?”
“We keep you sane!”
As I looked at the two cute polar bears, the egotistical tiger and the innocent gollywog who sat in the middle of our bed with the doona pulled up to their chins I couldn’t help but agree. I was sane and it was a massive job making me that way.